Haunting Garment

I look at my hanging clothes and feel the horror

An empty dress hangs on the wardrobe, I know its every corridor

Behind it hangs a gray one I never wore

And westward lies a purple one, unknown before

And before them a blue one calls my blue blouse sings

Alongside, the gray it rests, like paint on canvas wings

To the southeast of it some paintings dwell

But in this view some wicked void begins to swell

As if I’m bound to die or gave My Soul back to G-d

What still lives in me, show me one breathing place

I have all I wished for, more each passing day

Only one thing’s missing, an honest gaze that stays

Everything around is false and counterfeit and fake

But do I long? No longing’s mine to take

For it has always been this way, since the time began

The older one becomes, the duller grows the span

And when the mind expands the rib will pierce the Heart

So does the Heart then grow? Perhaps it did till torn apart

You fool there’s no room left for Heart to nest

Yours is rotten, Roni just like all the rest

Never myself again, more lies than breath

All I have but money is but slander dressed as death

And money too will fade, just like did my joy

But there’s never enough, so I run like a toy

Till I fall beneath some stranger’s graceful knee

Do I like that jealous boy I see?

No but G-d made him beauty-born

Is that all I deserve, such mockery and scorn?

No, I deserve death and a kiss in the end

But I will vanish faste, than the justice will descend

A note’s been signed and waiting still

How do I live, when my mind is nil?

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